I don’t get political often. It’s not for me. Those sorts of proclamations hint at me having my act together and understanding nuances and whatnot. I assure you, I neither have my act together nor do I understand nuances. Ever. Add to that this current political climate of unhinged mayhem and plan on finding me hiding out in a cave for the rest of the year. Still, something that seems to be dominating the world of Gen Z lately has my knickers in a knot. The fever pitch has me willing to hop up on a soapbox long enough to pen 800+ words. There’s a new phrase in town. They call it Trad Wife.
If you’re a diehard conservative conspiracy theorist, you probably understand what I’m about to say. Governments are inherently evil. I am not specifying that our government is any more or less evil than any other country’s administration. They are all run by humans. Humans, by design, even when we try to do good, are selfish and greedy and never entirely altruistic. I shall be very careful to connect these dots as gingerly as possible. All governments benefit from fear. Masses of people with courage and bravado on their side are difficult to rule. Fearful folks are far easier to control. Now that we’ve managed to agree on a basic theorem, let’s progress on to some other facts.
Imagine a random government – not ours, of course (wink) – sitting around a kitchen island one afternoon. One branch says to another, “Man, these people are getting hard to manage.” So, they put their figurative heads together and come up with an idea. “What if we discouraged family units? Made it financially impossible for families to get by? Made it disgraceful for women to stay at home with children?” You and I may read this and laugh. Why would anyone believe any of these things were valid ideas? Look around. I was a stay-at-home mom for 12 years. I was also a working mom for many years. During my SAH days, I cannot deny that it was mortifying to answer the “what do you do” question. “Well, I used to be a…. I plan on going back to…..” That’s where Gen Z comes into play.
The term Trad Wife is everywhere on social media. It stands for a wife in a traditional role – a homemaker, if you will. Rather than saying, “I don’t want to work right now,” the Trad Wife movement is born of women who want being a mother and a homemaker to be the end goal. They seek to put away the embarrassment factor of the 80s and 90s. Their battle cr y is this: If your wildest career dream is raising beautiful children and tending to all the intricacies of a home, it is admirable. As you can imagine, Trad Wives are getting raked over the coals. Hard stop. Not everyone needs to be a stay-at-home mom. Also, not everyone needs to be a teacher. We all cannot handle the rigors of medical school. Some of us can’t do simple math. It’s me. I am some of us. Anyway, before you paint me in the color of traitor to the gender, know that I don’t believe that silliness. Add to that the understanding that not every woman who wants to stay at home can do so, especially in this economic climate. But the ideology that making a life of homesteading, childrearing, and home economics as important as a career for anyone who has such a desire and a keen interest – I’m all about that mentality.
Still, when I see young moms getting roasted by other women for lifestyle choices, it chaps me. “Oh, look at the poor Trad Wife and her sourdough bread. Blink twice if you need us to rescue you.” The world is a scary enough place without us ganging up on each other. When a trip to the grocery store leads you through a list of ingredient contaminants that all promise a demise of the human body, growing our own food doesn’t sound bad at all. And what about sewing? Gardening? Budgeting? These all require skills that can’t be taught. They must be mastered by many trials and much error. And if these all sound like fates worse than death to you, I assure you that your outside-ofthe- home job is equally useful and so very needed in the world.
I think what I really wanted to say is don’t let anyone tell you how to be you. Live your life in a way that shows respect to all and treat people as you want to be treated. Be fearless in your passions. Love your family the best way you can. Work hard. I’m off to coin a new term. If there can be Trad Wives, there can be stayat- home dog moms, right? Cats, too? These pets aren’t gonna raise themselves.
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