Anxious all the time Dear Anxious all the time, I need to start this by reminding you that Aunt B’s advice is general advice. It should never be taken as personal therapy. All you are getting is Aunt B’s opinion of things. There are many people that know way more than Aunt B. All this being said, if you need professional help, reach out to someone. Do not consider my advice as professional help. If you are not sitting down with a professional talking one on one in a personal and professional setting, you are not getting that type of advice. I don’t believe you any longer need to be in person. I have heard of some good programs that you might meet with a mental health professional through an online portal. Just be sure and check out the organization and the individual's credentials.
Ok, anxiety is a complex thing. I really don’t think there is anyone that doesn’t experience anxiety. Of course, like everything, anxiety is on a continuum. All that means is if you drew a linear line and plotted people’s anxiety levels along that line, there would be people on the far left (experiences very little anxiety) all along the line to the extreme right (anxiety is incapacitating), and most people would fall on that line. Most people would lie in the very center of this imaginary line. Wow, I am really feeling like I am in college again just talking like this.
So where are you on that line of levels of anxiety? It’s always good to assess where your starting point is. If you need help with this, again a professional might be your best choice. How does anxiety show up in your life? What are the actual symptoms that you experience? Look deep into this. Examples are:
•My heart races when I think about certain things.
•I worry about everything. How does worry show up in your life?
•I have a hard time leaving my house because of my fear something bad will happen.
•I stay away from certain situations because they make me nervous. (Again, what does nervous feel like to you?)
My point here is just to get clear what you are dealing with. This tells you where to start. It also gives you a basis from which you can judge the progress you make.
Next step I want you to take is to figure out where that anxiety exists in your body. We generally think it exists in our mind because it is the thoughts that surround the anxiety that grabs our attention. Most believe that it is within those thoughts that our answers lie. I am beginning to disagree with this. I believe that the answers lie in our bodies and where we feel the anxiety. So much of anxiety work must be done with the body. What does that look like? It looks like massage, prayer, meditation, breath work, and a wide variety of body treatments. Dr. Russ Kenedy’s book “Anxiety RX'' gives a great deal of information and some great techniques for clearing anxiety from our body. I highly recommend this book.
Remember this may be too much for you to figure out yourself. Always get outside help if you need help. Never any shame in getting help. If you can, I often believe you can make faster and better progress. Remember to obtain that help from someone that aligns with your beliefs.
Love, Aunt B
If you would like to send Aunt B a question please email your question to news@ forneymessenger. com.
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