Ask Aunt B

Dear Aunt B, It's the last two weeks of the year. Do I just skate the year out or should I do something productive? I never seem to accomplish anything during this time. I use the excuse that I have too much to do to prepare for the holidays, but frankly I don’t do anything. What do you think?

Slow or Grow

Dear Slow or Grow, I love how my readers ask some questions that I am trying to solve for myself. I have been thinking this exact same thing. By the time this answer comes out we will have less than 10 days left in the year.

It makes little sense to me why we put so much attention on the beginning of the year. I understand it is the easiest new beginning time to identify. I do think it puts a lot of pressure on us, but I also think it gives us a good excuse to finish slow.

I think we should treat this last 10 days as a practice for what and how we want to live our lives. That being said, I mean balance. Balance is what I want for my life. Yes, I do have quite a few changes I want to make in the coming year, but I don’t want to lose sight of the great things that I did this year, even though that critical brain of mine says I didn’t get anything done last year. That would be a big dang lie. I am sure the same is true for you. So let's finish this year with a little reflection. What did you accomplish last year? What habits do you want to continue into the new year? What new friendships did you develop that you want to foster? What boundaries did you set that you are proud of? What times can you recall that were magical this past year? If any of these questions leave you scratching your head to answer, I challenge you to look closer, examine your year deeper.

At first blush, the magical question was the hardest for me. Have I told you all that I don’t celebrate things as much as I wish I did? I think of celebrations as magical so I couldn't really think of one. So I ask myself what do I think would need to happen to declare something magical? Of course I googled, “what makes experiences magical”. “Moments that are sparked by unexpected joy” is what I found. Of course I have had those, and the one that came into my mind was very very simple. It was a very normal day. It was very early in the evening and my husband was on the sofa. He had had a very trying day. The lights were dim; I think I had a candle burning. I love the atmosphere of candles. I looked over, and he was sleeping and looked so very content. I can imagine that this may seem very simple to you but to me it was magical. I was so very thankful that he was there and I was there and we were safe and he was comfortable enough to fall asleep. I can hear you naysayers. “It wasn't magical, he was exhausted” or “my spouse falls asleep on the sofa all the time”. I get that; my man falls asleep on the sofa all the time too. But it was what I did that made it magical. I looked at him smiled and it took my breath away and I appreciated our life. I guess, it doesn’t take a special time to make magical experiences.

So do it all in these last 10 days or do nothing at all. Remember, You are the boss of You. But whatever you decide to do, make it magical.

Love, Aunt B

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