Ask Aunt B

B Dear Aunt B, What if what I have become is something so different than what I ever thought or would have ever imagined? Is this ok or a problem?

Not What I Thought Dear Not What I Thought, You answer this question for me. Is it a problem or is it good, not just ok? You are really the only one that can answer this question because it can be either ok, a problem, or somewhere in between. I am guessing if it is really good, you probably wouldn’t be reaching out to Aunt B.

Are you inherently a different person or just living a different life than you always thought you would? We all do change as we age. Some things become more important to us than they were when we were younger, and of course some things become less important. Are you being true to yourself, or are you living a lie? I would always go for you to be authentic and true to yourself. If you are living a lie, why? Are you stuck in a life you don’t like? If so, and you know why, then start changing back to who you know you are.

You can be anything you want. Really you can. You are the only one standing in your way of being anything you want. Now just to be clear, if you are in a dangerous place with dangerous people, then do whatever you have to to get out and get out fast. Reach out to safe people. Reach out to authorities. The National Domestic Violence Hotline number is 866-442-7479.

If you are safe and just are checking out your future, then as always start with what you want. What do you want to be? How do you want to live? Do you dream about what you always thought your life would be like? Do you love your life and are just surprised by the difference in what you always thought?

Are you living with someone that doesn’t even know you are not living your dream life? Don’t assume they don’t have a dream life as well. You never know, you both may be dreaming of living larger. Way back in the day, I mean way back, there was a song that kind of addressed this very thing. Escape by R. Holms was the song, pretty good song.

I usually find people’s ideal life is somewhere in between what they always dreamed and something new. Go back to your dreams. Dream more. Find small ways to implement some of your dream life into your actual life. Then do more of that. Before you know it, you just might be living your dream life. As always, dream big.

Love, Aunt B

If you would like to send Aunt B a question please email your question to news@ forneymessenger. com.