Ask Aunt B

Dear Aunt B,

What is the number one skill I need to develop to be really successful? I am not the smartest person I know, but I know how to work. I really want to amount to something. Many don’t think I will.

Determined

Dear Determined,

Desire is a great start for sure. I am not sure I can limit this to just one skill but based on your question, I think you are up to the challenge.

Are you familiar with the term “Grit”? Besides being little pieces of sand, the definition I am looking for is courage, strength of character and resolve. In simpler words the ability to dig down deep and do what you know needs to be done even when you don’t necessarily want to do it. I believe this is one of the most important characteristics to becoming successful. I used to think you had grit or you didn’t but grit like many other needed characteristics can be developed and improved upon. Work hard.

Discipline is important. Goes right along with grit. One of the strongest ways to develop discipline is to figure out the few core actions you need to take to accomplish your goals and to do them every day. Yes, I said every day. Dang, I wish I didn’t have to say every day. I would much rather say do them when you feel like it but it just doesn’t work that way. Darren Hardy’s book ``The Compound Effect” is a great explanation of this principle.

Do what you do with heart. Put your special touch on things. Do the stuff you do with passion. Smile while you do what you are doing. People will notice.

I believe now is one of the greatest times to accomplish just what you are looking for. There are many workers that are disillusioned. If you show those who are watching that you are willing to work and excel at your work all with a smile on your face. Stand out from the crowd. If those around you don’t notice, you are in the wrong place. However my father would say don’t burn any bridges. Where you are now might not be the best place for you but things can always change. If you do decide to move on, do it with grace. Ask questions. What do I need to do more to be successful?

I once gave the advice to an employee, “Work so strong that if I had to let someone go, it would not be you.” Look for opportunities for advancement. Develop the skills needed for advancement.

Find a mentor. Nothing can accelerate your learning more than the wise counsel of someone who knows the ropes of what you are doing. Ask questions. Develop deep connections with wise, smart and kind people.

Study and continue to build new skills. There are many ways to learn new skills. Podcasts are excellent venues for finding great information.

Love,

Aunt B

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