Ask Aunt B

Dear Aunt B,

Summer is on the way. I want to be in better shape and I have gained quite a bit of weight this past winter. What do you suggest?

Bigger than I want

Dear Bigger than I want,

I am right here with you. I will be following my own advice as well.

First, forgive yourself. I know this sounds like a broken record from me, but nothing good comes from disapproving yourself. I understand the difficulty of this, but it is a worthy endeavor. So how do you change this one behavior? Recognize that you can’t win this war by arguing with yourself. When the critical voice rears its ugly head, just dismiss it as quickly as you can. I don’t mean to listen and then to tell yourself you have done the best you can and you can change it. I mean just dismiss it, I sometimes say something like, “Thanks for sharing” but anything more just keeps the negative talk going.

This doesn’t mean don’t challenge anything. Challenge much but proactively. What I mean, at a completely separate time do make positive statements and conclusions about the positive things you do. Appreciate yourself and your body. Set realistic goals about what you want to change.

Start where you are. I have a bad voice in my head that tells me, I can’t even begin to have success until I return back down to my weight before this extra that I have gained. This is just not true. Celebrate yourself and your improved health during each step of this journey. I believe that in order to have the final destination successful, I must enjoy the journey getting there. So find ways to make this fun. Do you enjoy competition? If so, set up a friendly competition with friends, family or co-workers.

Build better habits. Research shows us that it is easier to layer good habits on top of bad habits and crowd the bad ones out. One example would be to eat a large salad before you eat your regular dinner. Fill up with healthy food so there is little space left for not so healthy foods.

Do what you know. Most of us know what works. If you are unsure, there is great information on the internet. There are also a large number of scams available. I know you can find it in print, but I am pretty sure that I can’t get rid of all my belly fat in 7 days. If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. There are no magic pills. It pretty much comes down to the amount and quality of food you eat and the amount and quality of the way you move your body. There are many eating plans available. Find one that fits your lifestyle. One technique that I know works is to keep a food journal. Writing down everything you eat is a daunting task, but it makes clear where you are being successful and where you need work.

If you drink alcohol, realize that there are two concerns. First there are a large number of calories in alcohol. Second alcohol usually lowers inhibitions and triggers you to eat more. The food you are triggered to eat is probably not broccoli. Usually for me the trigger is to find the worst possible foods I have in the house.

The good news here is that you will feel better very quickly. It may take you some time to accomplish this goal but I find within one week of better behavior, I feel dramatically different. Good luck,

Love,

Aunt B

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