Body

Here. We. Go. Again. This is the way millennials write things in social media posts when they want to seem exasperated and they need you to imagine them rolling their eyes and taking a micro-pause in between each staccato embellished word. I know this because I have spent SO MUCH of my quarantime on social media. There are only so many ways I can attempt to teach myself to crochet, after all. Turns out, there’s not a big market out there for yarn knotted in the shape of a trapezoid. But, seriously, here we go…again. Cali has shut it down hard. Governor Cuomo is back with semi-regular briefings. And, unlike the spring influx of Covid, Kaufman County is currently being ravaged this time around. You may not agree with me. You also may not live with a septuagenarian with COPD. We lock up tight around here. With a shiny vaccine at the end of our tunnel, we just need to Wilson Phillips it for a little while longer. But, what is even left to do in this world? Like a mighty mouse carrying an extra Covid 15, I’m here in my too tight suit to save the day. Y’all like murder?

If you’re like me, and nothing else tickles your fancy quite like a new season of First 48 or the reboot of Unsolved Mysteries, I’ve got the hook up! Try a few true crime podcasts. A good podcast is like a modern day 30’s radio show. Someone spins you an excellent yarn, but your imagination gets to do half the work. Plus, it’s perfect for projects. You can’t watch television while you sew, or dig in your flowerbed, or rebuild a transmission. But, you can pop in some headphones and get transported to another place and time without ever looking up. Maybe it was all those years of playing clue with my kids, or the fact that I was the only 10 year old child waiting in line at B. Dalton Books at Town East Mall the day Stephen King’s The Shining came out, but nothing sucks me in like a good old murder mystery. Not sure where to get started? Worry not. I gotchu boo (more cool social media lingo). While not all of these involve malicious mayhem, they all have a sinister hook to keep you listening.

Let’s start off with the granddaddy of podcasts, the one that made us all sit up and take notice, Serial. Did Adnan really murder Hae Min Lee in 1999? What went on during that trial? Sarah Koenig sorted through thousands of documents, trial details, interrogations, & interviews to bring you what is probably still the best podcast I’ve ever been addicted to. You’ll feel like you earned your detective badge and passed the bar by the end of this one. And, I’m picky about the narrator’s voice. Sarah has the best one in the biz. Next, I will never forget where I was when I first clicked play on episode 1 of My Favorite Murder. Do hosts Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark have potty mouths? Did they put the lib in liberal? Double yes on that. But, no one can tell a story as entertaining and hilarious as these 2 can. Maybe my inner child is a liberal feminist from California? Karen and Georgia were so successful that they spawned their own podcast network. First on their lineup were two of my ultimate podcast crushes: investigative journalist Billy Jensen and retired Contra Costa County Sheriff’s Office Cold Case Investigator Paul Holes – yes, the one who caught the Golden State Killer. Their show, The Murder Squad, goes deep into the investigative details of the grizzliest cases and ends with a “help us solve this murder” to do list for all the listeners. While we’re on the topic of podcast duos, no list would be complete without Crime Junkies. Real life childhood BFF’s Ashley & Brit will have you feeing like you’re discussing everything from murders to disappearances to cold cases with your best girl gang. And, how about a trio? Remember Billy Jensen? If you want to hear him ridiculed by a former concert scene girl (the amazing Jac Vanek) and documentary producer/granddaughter of Art Linkletter (Alexis Linkletter), all while discussing dark and sinister who-done-its with input from actual people with 1st hand knowledge, The First Degree will butter your bread. If you prefer your illegal activity discussed on more of an NPR level, you won’t be disappointed with Criminal. Host Phoebe Judge is a young, hip version of Keith Morrison from Dateline. Interested in beautifully produced cases where the narrator’s words paint gentle pictures with jewel tones? The CBC’s David Ridgen, Someone Knows Something, can pull you into a mystery like no one else. If you’re looking for a story with a TV show to watch afterward, Payne Lindsey is your guy. His Up & Vanished series of podcasts seasons have been converted into both TV specials and a series. My favorites are the Tara Grinstead episodes from Georgia. And, finally, though I’m unjustly leaving so many out, I just finished episode 1 of the brand new Texas Monthly podcast spearheaded by the amazing Skip Hollandsworth (legendary author, journalist, screenwriter, and editor responsible for the novel Midnight Assassin, a lifetime of contributions to Texas Monthly, & a little movie called Bernie, starring Jack Black), Tom Brown’s Body. Well done, Skip. Very well done.

You’ve been warned, Covid. As for me and mine, we’re masking up, hunkering down, and tuning in. Don’t come looking for me in the secret passageway off of the conservatory. I have a candlestick and I’m not afraid to use it.