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Dear Aunt B,

I am always changing my mind. I think something is wrong with me. Help.

Who knows what I will decide

Dear who knows what I will decide,

This can be a problem for a lot of people. Myself included. There is a good possibility that one could ask a question today and then again in a month or more and my answer could be majorly different. Why might that be? Things change, you get new information or simply you just change your mind.

I find there are a few reasons that we change our mind.

You don’t trust yourself.

Are you the kind of person that trusts your gut? If so, are you usually right? Then make a decision and stick with it. It is always tempting to change our mind right before the final. Remember multiple choice answers in school? They always said to go with your first answer and then not to go back and look over and change the answer. Usually our first answer is the correct one or at least odds are better in our favor.

You get the advice of two many advisors.

Too many cooks spoil the broth. There are more opinions than I ever dreamed possible. It can be more confusing than helpful to enlist the help of many others when making decisions.

You get the advice of the wrong advisor.

Never ask the advice of someone that has it less together than yourself. Never ask the advice of someone you don’t share the same taste with. Never ask the advice of someone that doesn’t share your character or ethics.

Situations and details change.

This will always happen. Make the best decision you can at the time. If and when things change adapt if you can. It will all work out.

You rush into the decision.

It is best to think things through, at least a little bit, before you decide-especially large decisions.

You put off the decision until it is too late and then you just pick something to pick something.

I am pretty good at this one. It usually doesn’t work the best. There have been times it worked great, which usually just feeds my habit of procrastination. Think of all the grief we would save ourselves if we just made an informed decision before it goes on so long. The stress and pressure is alive and wears on us the whole time we are putting the decision off.

So to recap:

Trust yourself. Gather advisors that you trust. Understand change is inevitable. Make the best decision with the information you have or can gather at the time. Take your time but not too much time.

Good Luck.

Love,

Aunt B

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